Dr. BethAnne Kapansky Wright

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Got Gratitude? (a few ideas for cultivating appreciation)

We often think of November as a month that is associated with gratitude.

Many of us celebrate Thanksgiving/Friendsgiving/Gathering Together and the beginning of the holiday season with the intention to spend time with family, friends and loved ones for good food, celebration, and appreciation for the abundance in our lives.

As we move into the holidays, we are presented with many opportunities to slow down, reflect, appreciate life’s gifts, and simply be grateful.

It can be hard though—the gratitude thing.

Despite our best intentions, it’s easy to miss out on opportunities for gratitude and instead get caught up in focusing on stressors, the things that feel wrong in the world, and anything we feel is lacking in our lives.

Years ago, during a particularly challenging season in life, I wrote a poem called Relentless Gratitude that began with the line, “Gratitude is as elusive as the breeze, one moment here, next moment is gone—" and I’ve found this to be oh so very true.

If we don’t put energy into being grateful, it’s easy for our sense of gratitude to slip from our grasp.


For many of us, gratitude is not our normal set point.

Feeling content with our circumstances and peaceful in our being often goes against our mind’s tendency to fixate on anything that feels problematic, stressful, or anxiety-producting.

Daily stressors add up. Our attention is often pulled in multiple directions at once. This human thing can be hard - the struggle is real.

And all of these things can compound to block us from accessing more grateful, peaceful, easeful states of being.

It’s easy to fall out of rhythm with appreciating, and we have to take time to tune our hearts back to a more grateful space.

So, with that in mind, I created this fun little blog to offer a few simple ideas for how to tap into greater gratitude and grow the uplifting, life-giving art of appreciation in your life.

Let’s dive in and get our gratitude on!


  1. Clear space for gratitude to happen.

I often liken the mental chatter in our mind as a thick layer of smog that we need to clear and burn off, if we want to hone our focus to better see life’s light.

Sometimes we need to declutter all the things taking up mental space so we can set the stage for gratitude to take place.

As a writer and avid journaler, I like to make a list in my journal of all the stuff cluttering up my mind. Little bullet points that note any stressors, reminders, and/or intentions for the day ahead.

This practice helps clear off whatever’s sitting on top of the metaphorical inbox in my mind, so I can then tap into a greater space of intention and positive attention.

Whether you write, draw, reflect, list, or use movement or meditation – I’m a big believer that finding a practice that helps you clear the clutter from your mind and create space for the light to shine through is essential for creating space to access greater gratitude.


2. Develop an eye for noticing the good each day.

What is going right? What are your blessings? What are the small comforts and positives each day that are right in front of you?

Asking ourselves these questions can help us train our eyes for small ways we can feel appreciative.

Know that our mind can often be resistant to this practice. As if it’s trite or impractical in the face of life’s demands and stressors, and yet it’s often the simple things in life that help create a sense of satisfaction.

That first cup of coffee in the morning. Catching the colors of the sunset or sunrise. Cherishing sinking into the couch after a long day. Small moments of connection with family or friends. A small exchange of kindness while out and about helps remind you how much good there is in this world.

There’s almost always good to be found in each day when take the time to acknowledge and appreciate it.


3. Remember how far you’ve come and a time when you wanted what you have now.

It’s a strange paradox that we work so very hard to reach a goal or life stage and then once we do, we often become used to it, forget how much the idea of it once meant to us, and then turn our sights to the next thing we wish to dream/achieve/create.

It’s for this reason that I’m a big fan of taking time to take stock and reflect on our journeys and celebrate all small steps and wins.

It’s important to remember how far we’ve come. The challenges we’ve already made it through. The growth we’ve had. The wisdom gained through the lessons we’ve experienced.

To remember that for many of us, there was once a time when we wanted what we have now.

Reflecting on our progress helps us develop appreciation and respect for our journey.

It helps us shift our minds from a negative space of regret and lack to a gentler space of wholeness and self-acceptance. And acceptance is always a more peaceful, grateful place to be.


4. Think about what advice you’d give your younger self on how to live with more appreciation and thanks.

What would you tell yourself if you could go back and share life advice on how to live with more wellbeing?

What words of encouragement, wisdom, kindness, or inspiration might you impart?

What would you teach yourself about being grateful?

I have a feeling that most of us would give our younger selves guidance to try and relax more, trust the process, and let life unfold. We might tell ourselves we’ll make it through and that it’s going to be okay.

We might tell ourselves to appreciate and cherish our moments, because life is fleeting and flies by so fast.

Maybe you write a letter to your younger self. Or just muse on this question in your mind. Know that your answers to these questions can help you access your unique brand of wisdom that you can apply to your life today.


5. Develop a practice of saying ‘thank you.’

Speak these words in your heart. Or out loud to the universe while driving in the car. Or to anyone anytime you have an interaction or connection that gives you cause for appreciation.

Make a gratitude list and at the bottom write out - ‘thank you.’ Take a mindful moment to appreciate something lovely going on around you and say ‘thank you’ in your mind.

Offer your ‘thanks you’s’ to the sky like a prayer of peace and hope. Saturate your life with grateful grace.

Nurture the energy of appreciation by being liberal with your thanks. Be genuine. Infuse your words with sincerity.

Make it a practice to give thanks so often that it becomes habitual and intentional and simply part of the fabric of who you are.

Know that any offering of thanks is good medicine when it’s said with intention and kindness.


That’s the thing about all this gratitude stuff – it IS medicinal.

Gratitude is healing. It opens our hearts. It helps us feel interconnected. It supports our mind in focusing on what is good and hopeful in our lives.  

Gratitude is a balm of goodness in a world that can be filled with stress and strife.

It teaches us to anchor into the frequencies of contentment, inner peace, and lovingkindness. When we are anchored into these energies, we feel brighter and lighter. Able to give to ourselves and those around us.

There is no big secret to gratitude, but there are practices that we can do to cultivate the seeds of gratitude.

We can learn to be persistent gardeners who carefully tends to our inner worlds with a keen eye for increasing appreciation in our lives.

In the words of my younger self who once wrote that poem about having relentless gratitude--


If you enjoyed this post you might also enjoy the blog Grace, Growth & Gratitude or this recent episode from the Your Heart Magic Podcast.

If you’re loving the spirituality and heart wisdom vibes and want to stay connected, you are welcome to sign up for my free newsletter Akashic Magic where I share monthly wisdom from the Akashic Records to inspire our light.

Be love. Be well. Be you. Be magic.